I saw something tonight. Something that I had thought for years, I would never again see. The gas price being in the 80's. 89 cents tonight at the Petro.
I remember years ago declaring I would do something if the gas price ever returned to 80 some cents. The problem is I forget what that something was. I'm sure I spoke of it to someone, so if anyone remembers, please remind me.
The title of this post was what I received in my fortune cookie the other day, with 'in bed' added on. Always add 'in bed' to the end of your fortune to make it more entertaining.
2006-09-26
What does he want me to do, go to EI and say hello there, I've been hauling shopping carts out of ponds for 18 years...give me a fu*kin check please
Friday saw a visit to the theatre for some Jackass 2. I don't remember the first one but knew the only way to see # 2 would be in a theatre for the reaction of others. I don't think anyone stopped laughing the whole way through, probably one of my favorite movies of the year.
The Trailer Park Boys movie finally comes out in a few weeks, October 6th.
There is only one way to properly watch it; get liquored up, catch the early showing, then go to the BHT afterwards.
View the trailer here.
Saturday night started off at my house with Kelly, Vanessa, Paige, Nikki & Stephanie. After about 200 pictures being taken & a game of Malarky, we finally made our way to the BHT.
I had my usual drink, while watching some older people try dancing to some 80's favorites on the jukebox. Due to the lack of anyone being there, we quickly made our way to the O'house.
It wasn't long until Kris G. yelled out the phrase, "Who the Fu&*k would wear that dress here!" in the direction of some falling over bridesmaids.
We had front row seats for 3 girl on girl dance floor fights. While a lot of punches were thrown + a few kicks, not many made contact. I would only give it a 6.5/10. What happened to the days of throwing a glass or bottle at each others head?
Paige - aka 'Wheels', took us to Mcdonalds. It was a lengthy wait in the drive thru, but thanks to Joey's running off to use the bathroom and harassing Paige, it seemed to pass quickly. I had the Double Quarter Pounder. I also scored some ranch sauce - this is important as I was viciously denied requesting it in a previous visit. I will keep it in my fridge for years as a memory.
After finishing food, Kelly requested to be pushed around in a shopping cart by Vanessa, so we headed for Walmart. There were some employees outside though. Eventually we found some carts out back of Northumberland Square for the mission to be completed.
The drive home was not without incident, a few complaints from Joey about having to shit himself followed by what Paige claimed to be a cat crossing the road, which caused a near rear end by a tailgating taxi.
The Trailer Park Boys movie finally comes out in a few weeks, October 6th.
There is only one way to properly watch it; get liquored up, catch the early showing, then go to the BHT afterwards.
View the trailer here.
Saturday night started off at my house with Kelly, Vanessa, Paige, Nikki & Stephanie. After about 200 pictures being taken & a game of Malarky, we finally made our way to the BHT.
I had my usual drink, while watching some older people try dancing to some 80's favorites on the jukebox. Due to the lack of anyone being there, we quickly made our way to the O'house.
It wasn't long until Kris G. yelled out the phrase, "Who the Fu&*k would wear that dress here!" in the direction of some falling over bridesmaids.
We had front row seats for 3 girl on girl dance floor fights. While a lot of punches were thrown + a few kicks, not many made contact. I would only give it a 6.5/10. What happened to the days of throwing a glass or bottle at each others head?
Paige - aka 'Wheels', took us to Mcdonalds. It was a lengthy wait in the drive thru, but thanks to Joey's running off to use the bathroom and harassing Paige, it seemed to pass quickly. I had the Double Quarter Pounder. I also scored some ranch sauce - this is important as I was viciously denied requesting it in a previous visit. I will keep it in my fridge for years as a memory.
After finishing food, Kelly requested to be pushed around in a shopping cart by Vanessa, so we headed for Walmart. There were some employees outside though. Eventually we found some carts out back of Northumberland Square for the mission to be completed.
The drive home was not without incident, a few complaints from Joey about having to shit himself followed by what Paige claimed to be a cat crossing the road, which caused a near rear end by a tailgating taxi.
2006-09-21
You know you're in trouble when Cory Feldman thinks you should have an intervention
The other day I stumbled upon what I thought was a disturbing trend.
Teachers.
The high amount of people I went to school with that have become teachers. I can count 5 or 6 without thinking about it. I think they will all be good at it, but missing something.
Back in my day, teachers were people who had life experience, & told stories about it almost every day.
They wrote books, built pools, escaped a DUI conviction, had a student-teacher sex scandal, got high on history, and appeared on jeopardy.
You could learn more from listening to their stories than the actual material being taught in class.
Now it seems everyone I know becoming a teacher has never left school. They went from high school, right into university, and right back to school for work. I'm sure they have gathered life experience, well drinking experience, while in university.
Don't get me wrong, a career of always being in school has advantages. Like never working a summer or weekend, & "I get older, they stay the same age."
Anyway this trend bothered me until I remembered a key factor. All of us have heard a line like this from a parent about one of our teachers; "(enter name here)! He/She couldn't teach a dog how to shit." or a reference about them being an alcoholic. So I guess things will pretty much work out to being the same.
I look forward to some interesting parent-teacher meetings when I'm older. "Hey do you remember when we used to try and set this classroom on fire?" or "You were pretty drunk at the BHT the other weekend, was that a student you were with?"
On a side note, as discussed with Andrew, it's been a long time since M.Leblanc has been seen out drinking, or out doing anything anywhere. My theory is, with all the history being made in the middle east these days, he is home taping CNN 24/7 and writing his own textbook, titled "Getting High on History"
I hope to get a signed copy.
Teachers.
The high amount of people I went to school with that have become teachers. I can count 5 or 6 without thinking about it. I think they will all be good at it, but missing something.
Back in my day, teachers were people who had life experience, & told stories about it almost every day.
They wrote books, built pools, escaped a DUI conviction, had a student-teacher sex scandal, got high on history, and appeared on jeopardy.
You could learn more from listening to their stories than the actual material being taught in class.
Now it seems everyone I know becoming a teacher has never left school. They went from high school, right into university, and right back to school for work. I'm sure they have gathered life experience, well drinking experience, while in university.
Don't get me wrong, a career of always being in school has advantages. Like never working a summer or weekend, & "I get older, they stay the same age."
Anyway this trend bothered me until I remembered a key factor. All of us have heard a line like this from a parent about one of our teachers; "(enter name here)! He/She couldn't teach a dog how to shit." or a reference about them being an alcoholic. So I guess things will pretty much work out to being the same.
I look forward to some interesting parent-teacher meetings when I'm older. "Hey do you remember when we used to try and set this classroom on fire?" or "You were pretty drunk at the BHT the other weekend, was that a student you were with?"
On a side note, as discussed with Andrew, it's been a long time since M.Leblanc has been seen out drinking, or out doing anything anywhere. My theory is, with all the history being made in the middle east these days, he is home taping CNN 24/7 and writing his own textbook, titled "Getting High on History"
I hope to get a signed copy.
2006-08-23
Sometimes I just go for it
Last week Kelly & I headed to F'ton for a few days.
Night one featured some drinking with Andrew & Tracy.
I was unaware I consumed half my Southern Comfort during the sitting that featured some random card games, television viewing & musings.
I finished the night off in style with a super donair & garlic fingers.
The following day Andrew & I made our way for some golf, followed by a short recess break then downtown + mall adventure.
It was my first golf outing in about 8 years. I was where I expected to be, which was like starting all over.
I think golf will become a more regular hobby for me, as I need some non alcohol related activities. Although I'm sure as with pool, my golf game would be better with some alcohol, especially if it was at a course called "The Blackhorse"
After a visit to the hobby shop & a walk around downtown, we headed to the mall. I didn't buy anything, but this trip would later inspire my book wish list, & amazon purchase of "Modern Drunkard" based on the website.
Other notables I want to purchase are; "The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks" "Uncle John's Gigantic Bathroom Reader" "101 Things to Do Before You Die" & a few other website based books like Tucker Max's "I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell" & the "College Humor Guide to College"
The Fredericton trip was capped off by one of Kelly's trademark supper gatherings, featuring Vettel, Tracy, Snaggle & Kyla.
The food was excellent & I introduced everyone to "Date My Mom" the lamest or best show on tv. Be sure to check it out on youtube.
After that it was off for some poker & excellent truths behind 80's songs.
Last Saturday Kelly & I joined Vanessa & Joey for some BHT/OH action.
It was a pretty laid back evening, eventually we met up with Oliver & JD for some conversation,& along with a few other people during our wandering around.
The night was finished off with some Subway rabbit food & watching Scarface till 4am.
The following day, I awoke not knowing I would later play "Supermarket Sweep" ---- I went to the grocery store at 4:51. I first got a basket & was just going to get some essential items, due to the closing time of 5pm. After a few feet into the store, I was reminded of the phrase, "Sometimes I just go for it" & decided to go for it.
I got a cart, & completed my grocery list by closing time.
Fast Forward: Uncle John's Bathroom Reader & The College Humor Book, have been given to me as a birthday present from Kelly.
Night one featured some drinking with Andrew & Tracy.
I was unaware I consumed half my Southern Comfort during the sitting that featured some random card games, television viewing & musings.
I finished the night off in style with a super donair & garlic fingers.
The following day Andrew & I made our way for some golf, followed by a short recess break then downtown + mall adventure.
It was my first golf outing in about 8 years. I was where I expected to be, which was like starting all over.
I think golf will become a more regular hobby for me, as I need some non alcohol related activities. Although I'm sure as with pool, my golf game would be better with some alcohol, especially if it was at a course called "The Blackhorse"
After a visit to the hobby shop & a walk around downtown, we headed to the mall. I didn't buy anything, but this trip would later inspire my book wish list, & amazon purchase of "Modern Drunkard" based on the website.
Other notables I want to purchase are; "The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks" "Uncle John's Gigantic Bathroom Reader" "101 Things to Do Before You Die" & a few other website based books like Tucker Max's "I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell" & the "College Humor Guide to College"
The Fredericton trip was capped off by one of Kelly's trademark supper gatherings, featuring Vettel, Tracy, Snaggle & Kyla.
The food was excellent & I introduced everyone to "Date My Mom" the lamest or best show on tv. Be sure to check it out on youtube.
After that it was off for some poker & excellent truths behind 80's songs.
Last Saturday Kelly & I joined Vanessa & Joey for some BHT/OH action.
It was a pretty laid back evening, eventually we met up with Oliver & JD for some conversation,& along with a few other people during our wandering around.
The night was finished off with some Subway rabbit food & watching Scarface till 4am.
The following day, I awoke not knowing I would later play "Supermarket Sweep" ---- I went to the grocery store at 4:51. I first got a basket & was just going to get some essential items, due to the closing time of 5pm. After a few feet into the store, I was reminded of the phrase, "Sometimes I just go for it" & decided to go for it.
I got a cart, & completed my grocery list by closing time.
Fast Forward: Uncle John's Bathroom Reader & The College Humor Book, have been given to me as a birthday present from Kelly.
2006-08-10
Get your coat, we're going out...
Saturday, I grabbed a shower around 9, enjoyed some Ultimate Prince Igor, then made my way down to the BHT to meet up with Oliver, JD, Jimmy & his g/f. I was flying solo for the night as Kelly was working.
First stop as always, was the TD bank. I have strong distaste for the new Green Machines. The 700 language options, flashing green lights around the debit card slot, & slow sticky keys are a real annoyance.
I grabbed my traditional drink at the BHT(rum, ice, dash of cola), made my way over to the table for some conversation & Jimmy Tricks.
After a couple hours of consumption, conversation, & story telling, I made my way outside for a special secret meetup with someone, then some conversation with Rob. M.
Next we made our way to the OH.
It was pretty empty --- that would not last long.
Some initial wandering around took place, before sitting down above the dance floor. JKenny was the first to appear, soon after Jimmy's sister appeared, then some of Kelly's friends, all while JD was away for a drink. By the time he got back, the place had suddenly gone from no one, to a pretty large crowd.
It wasn't the high school reunion type of crowd I enjoy, but was decent. More wandering around, sitting, & conversation took place, along with me being JD's Wingman, taking him to his missions, looping around, taking him back to home base when needed.
The drive home was provided by JKenny, I secured the shot gun position. Not 30 seconds after leaving we were pulled over by the 5-0, with four(4) in the back seat.
Jimmy felt a ticket was coming for sure as he was the odd one out with no seat belt, but after observing JKenny was a DD & there was no open liquor in the car, the reason for the stop was disguised as "no lights on" & we were back on our way.
During the stop the 5-0 made a comment about all the liquor being in our stomach, to which I recall Jimmy making a comment along the lines of , "Until we get home to the toilet."
"If is a very long word in Formula One; in fact, 'if' is F1 spelled backwards."
I watched the F1 race Sunday, it was interesting, & unpredictable to the finish, then returned to sleep for a few hours.
"Shake & Bake."
Monday night Kelly, Vanessa & I, along with a lot of other former MVHS people, attended the theatre for Talladega Nights. There were some funny parts, most were the ones shown in the commercials, probably the best part was about baby jesus, & the bloopers at the end.
Although I've been out of school for several years, I discovered I still group people by the year they graduated, & probably always will --- unless I discover a better system.
The next night it was back to the BHT. The field was myself, Kelly, James H, then joined by Kyla & JKenny, soon after Jermey & Jessie joined. A few drinks & conversation were had, but was a low key event, as can be expected on a Tuesday. Cmac also appeared for a bit.
If anyone wonders what Marv does when its not busy, I discovered the answer Tuesday night.
He enjoys snacks from the vending machine, watches Orange County Choppers, American Hot Rod & some original CBC programing.
After the BHT, Kelly, James & I headed to Tim Hortons for some food. It took 4 attempts before they successfully toasted my sandwich. The final result was rather good though.
First stop as always, was the TD bank. I have strong distaste for the new Green Machines. The 700 language options, flashing green lights around the debit card slot, & slow sticky keys are a real annoyance.
I grabbed my traditional drink at the BHT(rum, ice, dash of cola), made my way over to the table for some conversation & Jimmy Tricks.
After a couple hours of consumption, conversation, & story telling, I made my way outside for a special secret meetup with someone, then some conversation with Rob. M.
Next we made our way to the OH.
It was pretty empty --- that would not last long.
Some initial wandering around took place, before sitting down above the dance floor. JKenny was the first to appear, soon after Jimmy's sister appeared, then some of Kelly's friends, all while JD was away for a drink. By the time he got back, the place had suddenly gone from no one, to a pretty large crowd.
It wasn't the high school reunion type of crowd I enjoy, but was decent. More wandering around, sitting, & conversation took place, along with me being JD's Wingman, taking him to his missions, looping around, taking him back to home base when needed.
The drive home was provided by JKenny, I secured the shot gun position. Not 30 seconds after leaving we were pulled over by the 5-0, with four(4) in the back seat.
Jimmy felt a ticket was coming for sure as he was the odd one out with no seat belt, but after observing JKenny was a DD & there was no open liquor in the car, the reason for the stop was disguised as "no lights on" & we were back on our way.
During the stop the 5-0 made a comment about all the liquor being in our stomach, to which I recall Jimmy making a comment along the lines of , "Until we get home to the toilet."
"If is a very long word in Formula One; in fact, 'if' is F1 spelled backwards."
I watched the F1 race Sunday, it was interesting, & unpredictable to the finish, then returned to sleep for a few hours.
"Shake & Bake."
Monday night Kelly, Vanessa & I, along with a lot of other former MVHS people, attended the theatre for Talladega Nights. There were some funny parts, most were the ones shown in the commercials, probably the best part was about baby jesus, & the bloopers at the end.
Although I've been out of school for several years, I discovered I still group people by the year they graduated, & probably always will --- unless I discover a better system.
The next night it was back to the BHT. The field was myself, Kelly, James H, then joined by Kyla & JKenny, soon after Jermey & Jessie joined. A few drinks & conversation were had, but was a low key event, as can be expected on a Tuesday. Cmac also appeared for a bit.
If anyone wonders what Marv does when its not busy, I discovered the answer Tuesday night.
He enjoys snacks from the vending machine, watches Orange County Choppers, American Hot Rod & some original CBC programing.
After the BHT, Kelly, James & I headed to Tim Hortons for some food. It took 4 attempts before they successfully toasted my sandwich. The final result was rather good though.
2006-07-30
Fresh off the grill
A couple of weeks ago was Kelly's parents anniversary party.
There were a lot of things that could have been the highlight of the night; - The older woman telling some guy about how she does strip aerobics as her husband walked in, sitting down beside her, - Pauly(no mafia) attacking balloons, yelling, & starting to strip, - comments from Kelly about a woman of P. Curtis type, - Vanessa dressed as the Hamburgler.
But the highlight was Kelly's uncle David (aka Ron Jeremy look a like).
He had by far the best dance moves I have ever seen in my life, both in person or on tv.
Decked out in classic late 70's/early 80's attire ( striped red/white shorts, numbered shirt, not mesh) and had moves that can't be put into words. The best way to explain it was a combination of his upper body twisting to one side while his legs were going in the other direction, the knees doing a thing of their own. He could teach classes on how to do this shit.
All in all, it was a pretty solid event, I finished off my night of rum&cola + Ultimate Prince Igor with a couple pieces of cold KFC. I forgot how good that is after drinking, and how much a mistake it is for KFC to be closed when the bars get out.
I don't remember too much from the week. I kicked off this past weekend Friday morning with a 6am jog downtown. It was pretty calming running down there early in the morning with some music, if you can put up with the smell of shit coming out of the sewers & the 3 old people who drive around town at that hour.
I had a flock of seagulls follow me for a short bit through the Ritchie Wharf parking lot, thankfully none of them shit on my head.
Friday night was finished off by a couple of hours worth of looking for something outside in the rain in thick brush, I cannot go into further details of what that item may or may not have been.
Also Friday I received my acceptance letter to the APA for January. That means 5 months left before I become an official adult, 5 months left for drinking adventures, followed by 35 weeks of hardcore training, no alcohol.
Saturday I slept most of the day, highlight being a visit to BK where the following phrases were said to me; - "Nice Ride" - "Here you go, fresh off the grill"
I will admit it was the best BK Quad Stacker I've had yet. This thing had a whole layer of bacon, I'm sure they put half a pack on it, and triple the cheese.
I woke up this morning to watch the F1 race, followed by a few more hours of sleep.
Monopoly has finally arrived in the year 2006, getting rid of the money, in exchange for debit cards.
This is long over due. One of the biggest reasons I don't like the game is having to count, & we all know someone who cheats with the money, usually the person who is overly anxious to be the banker. This will also make it easier to drink & play, which is really the only way I like to play.
- Captain Bee's Blog. By far the best blog I've read in a long time. An anonymous blogger from the U of Windsor. I actually sat through reading back to the beginning & have copied a couple pages worth of posts to notepad for printing.
One of my favorite entries is Random Thoughts from Christmas Mass
There were a lot of things that could have been the highlight of the night; - The older woman telling some guy about how she does strip aerobics as her husband walked in, sitting down beside her, - Pauly(no mafia) attacking balloons, yelling, & starting to strip, - comments from Kelly about a woman of P. Curtis type, - Vanessa dressed as the Hamburgler.
But the highlight was Kelly's uncle David (aka Ron Jeremy look a like).
He had by far the best dance moves I have ever seen in my life, both in person or on tv.
Decked out in classic late 70's/early 80's attire ( striped red/white shorts, numbered shirt, not mesh) and had moves that can't be put into words. The best way to explain it was a combination of his upper body twisting to one side while his legs were going in the other direction, the knees doing a thing of their own. He could teach classes on how to do this shit.
All in all, it was a pretty solid event, I finished off my night of rum&cola + Ultimate Prince Igor with a couple pieces of cold KFC. I forgot how good that is after drinking, and how much a mistake it is for KFC to be closed when the bars get out.
I don't remember too much from the week. I kicked off this past weekend Friday morning with a 6am jog downtown. It was pretty calming running down there early in the morning with some music, if you can put up with the smell of shit coming out of the sewers & the 3 old people who drive around town at that hour.
I had a flock of seagulls follow me for a short bit through the Ritchie Wharf parking lot, thankfully none of them shit on my head.
Friday night was finished off by a couple of hours worth of looking for something outside in the rain in thick brush, I cannot go into further details of what that item may or may not have been.
Also Friday I received my acceptance letter to the APA for January. That means 5 months left before I become an official adult, 5 months left for drinking adventures, followed by 35 weeks of hardcore training, no alcohol.
Saturday I slept most of the day, highlight being a visit to BK where the following phrases were said to me; - "Nice Ride" - "Here you go, fresh off the grill"
I will admit it was the best BK Quad Stacker I've had yet. This thing had a whole layer of bacon, I'm sure they put half a pack on it, and triple the cheese.
I woke up this morning to watch the F1 race, followed by a few more hours of sleep.
Monopoly has finally arrived in the year 2006, getting rid of the money, in exchange for debit cards.
This is long over due. One of the biggest reasons I don't like the game is having to count, & we all know someone who cheats with the money, usually the person who is overly anxious to be the banker. This will also make it easier to drink & play, which is really the only way I like to play.
- Captain Bee's Blog. By far the best blog I've read in a long time. An anonymous blogger from the U of Windsor. I actually sat through reading back to the beginning & have copied a couple pages worth of posts to notepad for printing.
One of my favorite entries is Random Thoughts from Christmas Mass
2006-07-15
Star Palace
Kelly & I ventured to Bay Du Vin last Sunday for some beach time, I sustained a pretty good sunburn & now have color for the first time in several years.
Wednesday I traveled to PEI to the APA to do polygraph testing, making solid highway time, arriving 2 hours earlier then expected.
During both adventures I took some random scenic shots while driving that turned out pretty good as they were one handed out the window @ 80-90km/h.
- "Luna City Arcade"
I had flashbacks of Star Palace when viewing these pictures.
Wednesday I traveled to PEI to the APA to do polygraph testing, making solid highway time, arriving 2 hours earlier then expected.
During both adventures I took some random scenic shots while driving that turned out pretty good as they were one handed out the window @ 80-90km/h.
- "Luna City Arcade"
I had flashbacks of Star Palace when viewing these pictures.
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